Friday, December 26, 2008

Laugh a little each day...

The Quickie
Bill and Marla decided that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their ten year old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony and order him to report on all the neighborhood activities.
The boy began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation. "There's a car being towed from the parking lot," he said. "An ambulance just drove by." A few minutes passed.
"Looks like the Andersons have company," he called out, "Matt's riding a new bike and the Coopers are having sex."
Mom and Dad shot up in bed. "How do you know that?" The startled father asked.
"Their kid is standing out on the balcony too," his son replied.
Come on it’s just a joke.
A big earthquake with strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hit Mexico.
Two million Mexicans have died and over a million were injured. The country is totally ruined and the government doesn't know where to start and is asking for help to rebuild. The rest of the world is in shock.
Canada is sending troops to help the Mexican Army control the riots.
Saudi Arabia is sending oil.
Other Latin American countries are sending supplies.
The European community {except France} is sending food and money.
The United States, not to be outdone, is sending two million Mexicans to replace the dead ones.
God bless America!!!!
A Car Full of Penguins
A man was driving along the side of the road with a car full of penguins, when a cop suddenly appeared in his rear-view mirror. The cop walked up to the car and exclaimed that if he didnt take the penguins to the zoo right away he would get a ten thousand dollar ticket. The man drove off on the way to the zoo.
Now he was a busy man and was late for a doctors appointment. So, he pulled over a guy named George on the road and gave him 100 dollars to take the penguins to the zoo for him. Now george loved animals, so he agreeed, and off they went.
An hour later the man was driving along on the way back from his doctors appointment, and he saw george walking along the side of the road with the penguins. " I thought i told you to take the penguins to the zoo." the man told george. " I did, " George replied, " Now we are going to the movies. "
Do You have an email?
A Jobless man applied for the position of 'office boy' at Microsoft. The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a test.
'You are employed' he said. Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may start.
The man replied 'But I don't have a computer, neither an email'.
'I'm sorry', said the HR manager. If you don't have an email, that means you do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job.'
The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only $10 in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a 10Kg tomato crate.
He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In less than two hours, he succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the operation three times, and returned home with $60.
The man realized that he can survive by this way, and started to go everyday earlier, and return late. Thus, his money doubled or tripled everyday.
Shortly, he bought a cart, then a truck, and then he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.
5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food retailers in the US ...
He started to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance.
He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan.
When the conversation was concluded the broker asked him his email.
The man replied,’ I don't have an email.'
The broker answered curiously, 'You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to build an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an e mail?!!' The man thought for a while and replied, 'Yes, I'd be an office boy at Microsoft!'
Moral of the story
Moral 1
Internet is not the solution to your life.
Moral 2
If you don't have Internet, and work hard, you can be a millionaire.
Moral 3
If you received this message by email,
you are closer to being a office boy/girl, than a millionaire. .........
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