Friday, September 5, 2008


Two doctors Dr Smith and Dr. Jones, one a psychiatrist and the other a Proctologist opened an office in a small town and put up a sign:
"Hysteria's and Posteriors."
The town council was not happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it To read: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids.”
This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to: "Catatonics and High Colonic's" No go.
Next, they tried: "Manic Depressives and Anal Reten tive." Thumbs down Again.
Then came: "Minds and Behinds." Still no good.
Another attempt resulted in: "Lost Souls and Butt Holes." Unacceptable again.
So they tried: "Analysis and Anal Cysts." No way!
"Freaks and Cheeks?" Still a no go.
"Loons and Moons?" Forget it.
Almost at their wit's end, the doctors finally came up with:
"Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Odds and Ends."
Everyone loved it!
Father and Daughter
A man and his little girl were on an overcrowded elevator. Suddenly a woman in front turned around, slapped him and left in a huff.
The little girl remarked, "That's okay, Daddy, I didn't like her either, she was stepping all over my toes. That's why I pinched her."
Back in Mumbai, when I was introduced to a guy Mr. Arvind Lele, he extended his hand and said 'Lele'. Taking his hand, I found it impossible to avoid replying 'Dede'.
He had a Goan wife who had separated from him, since her first name and the surname did not go together when she got married. Her name was Rosemary. You can see it was pretty embarrassing for her every time she said her full name in Hindi - Roz Meri Lele!
Out in USA, imagine the plight of an American lady introducing two Indians to each other with a straight face: She gestures towards the Indian lady, saying 'See my butt', and then towards the guy with 'Shake my boob'. That is how Seema Bhatt met Sheikh Mehboob.
Man and Woman
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unferrtilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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tags : man, woman, father, daughter, eggs, freaks, doctors

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