How to live life?

A boat docked in a tiny Goan village. A tourist from Mumbai complimented the Goan fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them. 

'Not very long,' answered the fisherman.  'But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?' asked the Mumbaite. 

The Goan fisherman explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family. 

The Mumbaite asked, 'But what do you do with the rest of your time?' 

'I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, play guitar, sing a few songs... I have a full life.' 

The Mumbaite interrupted, 'I have an MBA from IIM-A, and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger
boat.' 

'And after that?' asked the Goan. 

'With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Panjim, or even Mumbai. From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.' 

'How long would that take?' asked the Goan. 

'Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years,' replied the Mumbaite. 

'And after that?' 

'Afterwards? Well my Friend, That's when it gets really interesting,
'
chuckled the Mumbaite, 'When your business gets really big, you can start selling stocks and make millions!' 

'Millions? Really? And after that?' asked the Goan.. 

'After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings doing what you like with
your buddies.' 

'With all due respect sir, but that's exactly what I am doing now. So what's the point wasting 25 years?' asked the Goan. 

And the moral of the story is? Know where you're going in life. You may already be there. 
Life in the present world is indeed a rat race. Many who have qualifications from reputed universities too do not know where they are going in life. 

Give it a serious thought, and please don't forget to take charge of your health.

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Never even think of committing SUICIDE

On March 23 the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and
concluded that he died from a gunshot wound of the head caused by a shotgun.

Investigation to that point had revealed that the deceased had jumped from
the top of a ten story building with the intent to commit suicide (he
left a note indicating his despondency) . As he passed the 9th floor on the way
down, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast through a window, killing
him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the deceased was aware that a safety
net had been erected at the 8th floor level to protect some window washers
and that the deceased would not have been able to complete his intent to
commit suicide because of this.

Ordinarily, a person who starts into motion the events with a suicide intent
ultimately commits suicide even though the mechanism might be not what he
intended. That he was shot on the way to certain death nine stories below
probably would not change his mode of death from suicide to homicide. But
the fact that his suicide intent would not have been achieved under any
circumstance caused the medical examiner to feel that he had homicide on his
hands.

Further investigation led to the discovery that the room on the 9th floor
from whence the shotgun blast emanated was occupied by an elderly man and
his wife. He was threatening her with the shotgun because of an
inter-spousal spat and became so upset that he could not hold the shotgun
straight. Therefore, when he pulled the trigger, he completely missed his
wife and the pellets went through the window striking the deceased.

When one intends to kill subject A, but kills subject B in the attempt, one
is guilty of the murder of subject B. The old man was confronted with this
conclusion, but both he and his wife were adamant in stating that neither
knew that the shotgun was loaded. It was the longtime habit of the old man
to threaten his wife with an unloaded shotgun.  He had no intent to murder
her; therefore, the killing of the deceased appeared then to be accident.
That is, the gun had been accidentally loaded.

But *further* investigation turned up a witness that their son was seen
loading the shotgun approximately six weeks prior to the fatal accident. That
investigation showed that the mother (the old lady) had cut off her son's
financial support and her son, knowing the propensity of his father to use
the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation that the
father would shoot his mother. The case now becomes one of murder on the part
of the son for the death of Ronald Opus.

Further investigation revealed that the son became increasingly despondent
over the failure of his attempt to get his mother murdered. This led him to
jump off the ten story building on March 23, only to be killed by a shotgun
blast through a 9th story window.

The medical examiner closed the case as a suicide.

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GOD is refining us....

One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.

That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver.    

As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities.

The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: "He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver." She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined. 

The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.

The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?"

He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it"

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that God has his eye on you and will keep watching you until He sees His image in you.

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Happy Dusshera to everyone

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Happy Ramnavmi to everyone

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Life isn't fair.......

God created the donkey and said to him.
'You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset

carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have

no intelligence and you will live 50 years.'

The donkey answered: 'I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is much.

Give me only 20 years'
God granted his wish.
******* 
God created the dog and said to him:
'You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend. 
You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 30 years.
You will be a dog. '

The dog answered: 'Sir, to live 30 years is too much,give me only 15 years.'
God granted his wish.
*******

God created the monkey and said to him:
'You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks.
You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. '

The monkey answered: 'To live 20 years is too much, give me only 10 years.'
God granted his wish.
*******

Finally God created man ... and said to him:
'You will be man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth.

You will use your intelligence to become master over all the animals.
You will dominate the world and you will live 20 years.'
*******

Man responded: 'Sir, I will be a man but to live only 20 years is very little,

 give me the 30 years that the donkey refused, the 15 years that the dog

did not want and the 10 years the monkey refused.'
God granted man's wish
*******

And since then, man lives 20 years as a man ,
marries and spends 30 years like a donkey,
working and carrying all the burdens on his back.

Then when his children are grown,
he lives 15 years like a dog taking care of the house and eating

whatever is given to him, so that when he is old,

he can retire and live 10 years like a monkey,
going from house to house and from one son or daughter to another

doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.

That's Life. Is'nt it ??????????

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How to lose weight?

A fellow was reading the paper one day lamenting the fact that his doctor has ordered him to lose 75 pounds.  Next thing he sees is an advertisement for a guaranteed weight loss program.  Guaranteed like heck, he thinks to himself. But lets see what they think they can do.

He calls them on the phone and subscribes to the 3 day, 10 LB weight loss program.

The next day there comes a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nikes and a sign hanging around her neck.  She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.  The sign reads, If you can catch me, you can have me.

Well, without a second thought he takes off after her (like who wouldn't). A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.  After they are through he kisses the girl one last time and thinks to himself with a nod, I like the way this company does business.

For the next two days, the same girl shows up and the same thing happens each time.  On the fourth day, he weighs himself and, sure enough, he has lost 10 pounds.  Deciding that he likes his somewhat more slender physique, not to mention the method of treatment, he calls the company back  and subscribes to their 5 day, 20 LB weight loss program. He thinks that losing 20 pounds in only 5 days seems
like a lot, but he is intrigued by what their workout schedule might be like this time.

As expected, the next day there comes a knock at his door. When he answers it there stands a 22 year old knockout dressed in nothing but a pair of Reeboks and a sign hanging around her neck. She is simply stunning, the most beautiful woman he has ever seen.  She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, If you can catch me, you can have me. He's out the door like a shot. This gal is in excellent shape and it takes a while to catch her.  But when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze.  She is wonderful, the best he has ever had. He is really looking forward to the next four days... For the next four days, the same girl shows up
and the same thing happens each time, much to his delight.  On the sixth day, he weighs himself and, unbelievably, he has lost another 20 pounds.  I love this company, he thinks to himself, I never knew losing weight could be so easy and so much fun.

Feeling much better about himself, he decides to go for broke and
subscribe to the companies 7 day, 50 pound weight loss program. Are
you sure, sir? asks the representative on the phone. This is our most
rigorous program. Absolutely, says he, I love your program. haven't
felt  this good in years!  The next day there comes a knock at his
door and he enthusiastically answers it. There stands before him a 200
pound perfect specimen of a man dressed in nothing but racing spikes
and a sign around his neck.  He introduces himself as a representative
of the weight loss company.

The sign reads, If I can catch you, I can have you.

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